When life overwhelms us

For some of us the simple sounds around us can start to get overwhelming and we need to figure out just how to manage everything. The sounds that I am talking about is traffic outside where to live to even the sounds that are within your home. I know that living in an apartment building it means that we deal with quite a few sounds that we don’t have any control over. For someone that have very sensitive hearing these sounds can seem to be extremely loud even when they aren’t even audible to others around us. 

I know that there are times when I am sitting here at my desk, and I can enjoy listening to the little bits of sounds around me and then there are times when things just seem to start to escalate and I am not certain how to manage them. Living in an apartment building I know that I am going to hear the sounds from the units around us which normally aren’t too bad but there are times when a unit is getting renovated that the sounds seem to be extremely loud. Other sounds that we hear quite frequently while living in an apartment during are:

• Doors slamming because people don’t think about how them dropping their door will affect others.
• Crossing guard whistle during the day so that children and adults can cross the street. It used to be that the crossing guard only blew their whistle for children but now it seems they do it for everyone.
• Emergency vehicles sirens seem to be quite frequent and that is probably due to living in a high destiny area.
• Van doors slamming – this is due to veggies vendors being able to a park in a regular street parking park and sell their veggies for days/weeks/months on end.
• Car’s backfiring – this is due to cars not being tuned correctly so everyone has to listen to cars backfiring and almost sounding like gun shots around us on a very regular basis.
• People – children/adults thinking that bouncing on the floor is fun because that makes them happy and it doesn’t matter what time of day or night it is.
• Music playing – people not understanding that the sound of their stereo especially the base sound is going to be heard through multiple floors because where they stereo or speakers are located. Speakers on the floor are going to transfer sounds through multiple floors even if you don’t think that they do.

I know for someone like me there are days when I think I can manage everything just fine and then all of a sudden, the sounds seem to escalate and what I thought I could manage isn’t manageable any longer. The sounds that each person hears is going to differ and you have to understand and respect that when you live in a high destiny area even what you think might not be a loud noise could possible bother someone else.

As I am writing this blog there is someone on one of the floors above me that things that bouncing on the floor is a lot of fun. This sound is travelling through at least a floor or two and they don’t understand how others hear the sound. The other thing is when someone decides to knock on their wall because it just seems fun. The unit beside you is going to hear is so be prepared to get someone knocking back to let you know that you are heard.

Of course, there are going to be sounds that overwhelm us sometimes and then other times those same sounds are something we can manage. We just need to know that being able to escape from the sounds is something that we need to do and we also need to know that we have the method available that allows us to escape them.

I am going to post x number of days in a row

How many of us have heard someone on YouTube say that they are going to post x number of days in a row. I understand that is what you are going to try and do but maybe instead of saying “I’m doing to do” people need to say, “I’m going to try and post”. I think when you can be honest with both yourself and your followers it is going to go a long way.   

There are a lot of reasons why someone cannot post each day as they said they would, but they also need to understand that making a promise or commitment and not being able to achieve that isn’t good either. If you made that promise once and couldn’t maintain it that is one thing but if every time you say to your subscribers “I’m going to post every day” and you, don’t it doesn’t look good on your because you are not keeping that commitment that you promised. It would be better to say that “I’m going to try my best to post everyday through x”. Being able to tell your followers that you are going to try your best is better than doing that you are going to.

I have seen a number of YouTubers say that they are going to either post every day or every specific day and it doesn’t work and all they say is, I’m sorry I couldn’t do it today. Maybe they should think about rewording their promise because in too many cases they are over promising and under committing and that doesn’t look good on them. It is better to under promise and overachieve then letting your viewers/followers down because you haven’t been able to maintain your commitment/promise that you made.

I follow a number of YouTubers and so many of them don’t guarantee when they are going to post and what they say it make sure you hit the notification button so that you are notified when we post. That is the best way to ensure that you maintain your followers especially because life can happen and a post might not happen when you said it was going to happen.

So instead of saying that you will be positing x number of days in a row, you need to say that I am going to try my best to post during these days. It makes it so much better your subscribers because you aren’t letting them down because you said one thing and something else happened.

Presentation courtesy

When you are going to a presentation that is for a community, please remember that there are certain courtesies that you must consider because yes, the event might be free to attend, but there are guidelines that you should respect because there are others that are attending the event as well.

1. Silence your device – it is important that you silence your device so that it doesn’t interpret the presenter or any other attendee. Just putting your device on vibrate and then putting it on a table isn’t respecting those around you because it will disturb others around you.
2. Food and how much to take – yes, the food might be available for free because you are attending the event but make you that you are taking just a reasonable amount and not taking what could look you are taking stuff home to have later on. For example, if the pizza is party size, please remember that taking over 4 slices are going to be noticed even if you go back two, three or four times because people will notice you. When you end up taking 12 pieces of pizza people are going to wonder where you are putting all of that.
3. Arriving after presentations have start – mark sure you walk in quietly and DO NOT go and pick up pizza and pop because you are interfering with the presentation and not showing courtesy to the presenter or other attendees. Yes, you might want to have some pizza, but you are going to have to wait until there is a break and then you can get some pizza. I know, it is going to be cold by then, but you know when the presentations start so if you want to ensure you get warm pizza make sure you show up early. If you are thinking that the pizza is so important, it isn’t because you are not just showing disrespect to the presenter you are also disrespect to other attendees because you are blocking their view of the presentation.
4. Getting pizza at break or just before presentations start – if you are someone that is taking some pizza but before presentations start or during break make sure that you close the lid of the pizza box because you are blocking part of the screen from others that are attending the presentation.
5. Clean up after yourself - another thing that is extremely important is to make sure that you clean up after yourself at these events. A lot of the spaces are donated and one of the rules is leave the place as you found it. If the garbage can is full in the room where the event is being held, take the garbage out and find another garbage can because there are going to be other garbage cans out in the hall.

Yes, a lot of community presentations are there for a community, but you also have to show that you respect both the presenter and other attendees. Make sure that if you want to be part of the community make sure you show up ahead of the scheduled presentation time and if you can’t do that just come in quietly and take a seat and at break you can then enjoy any pizza and/or pop that remains.

 

  

I know

When you keep telling me that you know, doesn’t tell me that you have heard what I have said. We have a friend that when he talks to us his favourite words are “I know”. I think there are a lot of times he doesn’t have a clue what he has heard because he is too busy trying to figure out what he is going to say next.

This person that we know comes to an IT event that we are part of and a lot of me thinks that the only reason he comes to the event is to have the pizza that is provided before the event starts. I have seen this guy take between 10 – 12 pieces of pizza (not all at once but he comes back to the table quite a few times) and I am not certain if he eats them or if he packages them up to take home. He also never says to the end of the event and always leaves during the break so that kind of tells us where the importance is for him.

I understand that there are times when you are trying to just be friendly with others around you, but you have to listen to those that are you talking to because just saying the words “I know” don’t help at all. I have also had to deal with this same person waving their hand in my face without realizing that they are getting very close to hitting me. They are too busy talking to my husband and not seeing that I am sitting right there and needs to be considered.

I am extremely happy when he doesn’t decide to eat a slice a piece around me because he almost sounds like a cow when he eats. Yes, he is extremely noisy when he eats his food and that makes it difficult to manage as well. Hopefully, me getting upset with him has let him know that I don’t need to see/hear him eat.

When you say the words “I know” make sure that you are being honest with what you are saying and not just using those words as a filler. What makes me laugh is when my husband says something this guy listens to him, but when I say something, the immediate response is “I know”.  Well, that really tells me how much attention he pays to what I say, so that is the amount of attention/response I will be giving him in the future.

Membership renewal

I recently decided to let a membership that I had go because it wasn’t meeting my needs, so I figured that the cost of the membership wasn’t worth it. I decided to see how long it would take for the association to let me know that the membership had expired and I needed to act upon it to make sure that it didn’t expiry.

Once my membership passed its expiry date, I did receive a reminder that I need to renew to keep my membership status (no expiry date was given). Of course, with no end day for that reminder given why would I do anything because of course, I could still sign in as a member so there was nothing urgent that I needed to do. If you want someone to act within a specific time you need to tell them the specific time and not just assume that they will jump on it because of the reminder.

Here it is 30 days after my membership expired, I can still log in with my existing membership. Sure, my membership card it says it expired 30 days ago, but I still have the access that I didn’t think that I should have at this point. A day ago, I received a reminder that my certification would expire in 60 days but given that I haven’t paid my membership my certification should have become void. I know that I have let both my membership and certification expiry and a lot of that is due to the cost/benefit that I was finding for this association.

If I am paying $400 Cdn. a year for a certification and I am required to do 20 hours of professional development; you better make sure that the professional development is worth it. Of course, there was one ethical training that was required but the last time I say that training was in October 2024 and there hasn’t been once since. That training was not recorded so that meant that if you weren’t able to attend the training you were out of luck. Also, the CPE’s that I was required to achieve meant I had to continually hear the same things over and over again. A lot of the sessions where vendor specific and sometimes they didn’t meet the needs of my business.

Yes, it was a difficult decision to walk away from the association and my certification, but I had to make a decision and to the cost and the benefit for my business. If I was having to pay a lot of number and also spend a lot of time trying to maintain a certification that didn’t benefit my business, it was time for me to walk away. It was a hard decision to make but I made it for both my business and for myself because what was the benefit I was receiving?

 

 

Writing and the challenges

For someone that tries to write every day there are going to be challenge and some of the challenges is just getting the words down so that someone else can understand the feelings and thoughts that you are dealing with. It doesn’t have to be any major it is just sitting down and being able to write about the various thoughts and feelings. 

This evening, I was listening to a bunch of songs about feelings and being there and understanding what someone else is going through, but we also have to think about what we are going through at the same time because we might be able to be there for someone else but we also need to be there for ourselves.

As I am sitting here trying to get a bunch of thoughts, ideas and feelings out of my head, I know that there are a bunch of others that are trying to do the exact same thing and it can be such a challenge. Being able to sit down and just write and not let what anyone else says get in the way can be such a challenge and I know that I have done just that. I let some simple get in the way of me being able to write but I am now working on getting back to the writing that makes me happy.

When you are a writer and you want to write because that is what makes you happy you need to understand that even if someone says something that you think might be negative you need to step back and think about what the person might be saying. The person might be surprised at the amount of writing that you are able to accomplish, and they just messed up what they are trying to say. You also have to accept that a person might be jealous of what you are able to accomplish on a daily or weekly basis and you just need to accept that and move forward.

There are a lot of challenges that a writer needs to deal with and being able to accept the various comments either good or bad doesn’t matter because as a writer we need to do what makes us happy and if you let someone else’s comment stop you from writing that is a major problem. I know that I started to let a comment stop me from writing like I did before but after a simple conversation I have learned that the comments came out the wrong way and this person is encouraging me to write because that is what makes me happy.

How social media can impact people

Have you ever looked at social media and thought, boy would I love to have their life because it looks so much better than mine. Well, what you aren’t seeing is what the individual or family is going through outside of that post or video that they just posted. Everyone is going through some sort of challenge, and we must remember that that post or video is just a glimpse of a person’s life.

There have been times that I have watched videos and said they seem so happy during these few minutes of their life, but what is happening outside that bit of time. Some posts can show a happy person and that is the few minutes of happy they had for that day.

During the time that I have been watching YouTube videos I have seen a lot of heartache that is also shown and I think that makes the people true to themselves and true to their audience. If you are also showing the few happy moments, you are not even being true to yourself. What someone that posts on any type of social media is to lie to their audience. If you say one thing on one video and then you say the opposite on another video your audience is going to pick up on that.

 Inn one case, I was watching someone and they said they chose to leave their position and then suddenly they are saying that the company made the decision to let them go. Instead of saying they chose to leave their position, they could have simply said “it was decided it was better for me to leave my position”. This adds a level of untrust to the person because they aren’t being true to their audience.

Social media in some ways can show a false sense of always happy when the truth is that everyone has their good days and bad days and at least mentioning a little bit of the rough times will show an audience that you are human instead of showing them the false side of you. 

Something else that you must remember especially looking at Instagram posts there are a lot of filters and image correction that can be done to an imagine so the person lots different than they do in real life. Being able to look at some of those pictures and understand that they aren’t a true imagine goes a long way of realizing that the individual in that post is just the same as everyone else. Thinking that everyone on social media is beautiful and always happy is so wrong and I have heard people say that x person is always happy and is so beautiful, but when you look at them in real life, they are just the same as everyone else.